Friday, May 2, 2014

Oblivious

        Since I've been married, I've noticed some truth in the sterotype that men are dumb and or oblivious to women. It's become more apparent the longer I'm married. There have been so many "I'm not speaking to you" and "I can't stand to look at you right now" moments, that they can't be counted. My husband has gotten the "eye, finger, neck roll" combo move only to give a blank, confused stare in response. That "Bae, I'm sorry if I did something to upset you." move is not a good one. Why? Because, I'm pissed off at you for something you did or most likely didn't do, and you DON'T KNOW WHY! UGH!
   For instance, when our first was born, I would get off at 10:30 at night. I would come home and see our little baby sitting in her car seat, in the clothes she's had on all day sweating bullets. I would angrily sigh and get the baby out of the car seat, take her soaking, filthy clothes off and wipe her down. I would then have to feed and put her down for bed. I would be so upset with him! "I sure hope he doesn't think he's getting "any" tonight!" After about a month of me coming home to a hot, sweaty, stinky baby; I lost it! There were a lot of four letter words had in this rant, and none of them was love! At the end of my emotional diarrhea, my husband totally understood where I was coming from. What he didn't understand was, if him leaving the baby in her car seat was so upsetting to me; then why didn't I say anything at first?
   Well, here's why. We as women feel as though "they should know." Truth is, they really don't know. So, instead of us saying what a huge butt our partner is, try this instead. "Hey, bae, when you take your pants off, can you please unroll your underwear out of them?"
   I say all of that to say this, say something. You can't be upset with someone if they don't know what made you upset. No, they really don't know! Yes, they are that oblivious! Your husband is not a jerk, he's just a bit oblivious. Well, that's all I have for now! Until then, be kind and kindness will find you.

2 comments:

  1. I'm still in the process of learning this... Ill say I'm at phase 2.5 of this lol After the 5th time of reminding said husband, my sweet vocal chords are worn out. You have overdrafted and I only have short sharp verbs left. On the other side of my coin is if I say what I'm thinking, I'm afraid the sky may fall on his head and a wave of my honesty will wash him away...

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is so true, I'm finding myself saying hey bae u took a bath i think the baby needs one too.

    ReplyDelete